Apr 09
Players: Husband and wife. Activists: Both. Setting: Home or hotel. Aim: Put couples in touch with excessive pride by forcing them to have sex with a “freak.” Game Plan: This is the opposite of the children’s game of “Dress-Up,” the object of which is to make yourself look as beautiful as possible. In this game [...] [...more]
Posted: under Men's Health-Erectile Dysfunction.
Tags: Men’s Health
Players: Husband and wife.
Activists: Both.
Setting: Home or hotel.
Aim: Put couples in touch with excessive pride by forcing them to have sex with a “freak.”
Game Plan: This is the opposite of the children’s game of “Dress-Up,” the object of which is to make yourself look as beautiful as possible. In this game the couple make themselves as ugly as possible.
They set a time and place for a rendezvous. It could be at home or at a hotel. (Renting a room may work best, since it adds another exotic element to the game.) Before meeting, the wife and husband each dress and make themselves up so that they will appear as ugly and freaky as possible. For example, they may wear a grotesque witch or monster mask, or dress up in rags, or paint their faces oddly, or wear a wig, or put yellow gunk on their teeth, or douse themselves with awful-smelling perfume. They can cover their bodies with “green slime” (stuff sold in toy stores), or wear a pillow under their clothes to make it appear they have a hump or a fat belly.
*114/196/1*
Apr 09
Players: Husband and wife. Activists: Both. Setting: Large room, such as living room, den, basement, or garage. Aim: Rekindle a playful attitude toward sex. Game Plan: All of us, as children, once had a playful attitude toward sex. Indeed, in psychoanalysis we say that sex is regression in the service of the ego. When sex [...] [...more]
Posted: under Men's Health-Erectile Dysfunction.
Tags: Men’s Health
Players: Husband and wife. Activists: Both.
Setting: Large room, such as living room, den, basement, or garage.
Aim: Rekindle a playful attitude toward sex.
Game Plan: All of us, as children, once had a playful attitude toward sex. Indeed, in psychoanalysis we say that sex is regression in the service of the ego. When sex is going well, we become not only childlike but even infantile, expressing all the pent-up needs from the earliest past to the present. This game serves to directly facilitate this playful attitude toward sex and foster a regression in the service of the ego.
Tie a volleyball net, rope, or string across the middle of a large room. (Whatever it is, call it the net.) Mark boundaries of the minicourt with a tape on the floor, or use a 9′ x 12′ rug as the court surface. Blow up a balloon to the size of a volleyball; the balloon is the volleyball.
As in regular volleyball, the server stands behind the line to serve, and scores points only on his or her serve. After the serve, each player has three hits to get the ball over the net. (One hit can be used to block the ball, one to set it up, one to spike it, etc.) Play stops when a player either fails to get the ball back over the net or knocks it out of bounds. The first player to reach 15 points (one point per serve) wins.
*89/196/1*
Apr 09
Players: Depressed husband and fairy godmother (non-depressed wife). Activist: Nondepressed wife. Setting: Home. Aim: Draw depressed spouse out of his depression by appealing to a rescue fantasy. Game Plan: This game may be played with or without the depressed husband’s knowledge, according to the nondepressed wife’s discretion. One evening, while the depressed husband is moping [...] [...more]
Posted: under Men's Health-Erectile Dysfunction.
Tags: Men’s Health
Players: Depressed husband and fairy godmother (non-depressed wife).
Activist: Nondepressed wife. Setting: Home.
Aim: Draw depressed spouse out of his depression by appealing to a rescue fantasy.
Game Plan: This game may be played with or without the depressed husband’s knowledge, according to the nondepressed wife’s discretion.
One evening, while the depressed husband is moping around the house, the wife rings the doorbell. She is wearing a revealing fairy godmother costume of silk or lace, in a color that will appeal to the husband, with a crown of some sort and a flowing cape. She holds a golden wand in her hand. If she has small breasts, she may enhance her costume with falsies. The object is to be slightly outrageous, but in a charming way. When the husband opens the door, she says, blinking her eyes theatrically, “Hi, I’m your fairy godmother!” She prances into the room, whirls around, and glides toward him. “Yes, yes— I’m here, I’m here!” she breathes in a soft, sexy voice. “You called, and I’m here!”
*64/196/1*
Apr 09
Having them say “We’re all alone here” before they have sex, and then say the next thought, helps them get in touch with what they’re feeling, and is likely to bring up stuff they have been suppressing. The wife may say, “We’re all alone here,” and then, “Oh, God—now I have to depend on you\” [...] [...more]
Posted: under Men's Health-Erectile Dysfunction.
Tags: Men’s Health
Having them say “We’re all alone here” before they have sex, and then say the next thought, helps them get in touch with what they’re feeling, and is likely to bring up stuff they have been suppressing. The wife may say, “We’re all alone here,” and then, “Oh, God—now I have to depend on you\” The husband may say, “We’re all alone here,” and then, “Oh, God—now I’ll have to put up with your nagging!”
During the course of the weekend they will be forced in this way to confront many issues that have lain dormant. In addition, by having sex in new ways, they will be forced to work through sexual phobias that have served as defenses against intimacy, and this will in turn force them to confront even more issues. Hence the channels of intimacy, passion, and communication will be opened.
If they cannot “succeed” with the game the first time, and call the agent to pick them up, they can try the routine again until they get it. Such weekends may be repeated as needed, and may be combined with other games in this book.
*39/196/1*
Apr 09
These games differ from the usual games that lovers play in that they are designed to be therapeutic. The usual games that lovers play are compulsive. They are enactments of rituals that bring about a temporary gratification, but not the deeper joy of mature, tender merger with another being. Promiscuous individuals will have multiple lovers [...] [...more]
Posted: under Men's Health-Erectile Dysfunction.
Tags: Men’s Health
These games differ from the usual games that lovers play in that they are designed to be therapeutic. The usual games that lovers play are compulsive. They are enactments of rituals that bring about a temporary gratification, but not the deeper joy of mature, tender merger with another being. Promiscuous individuals will have multiple lovers and sometimes daily sexual experiences—but their sexuality will have a numb, addictive quality to it, with weak or nonexistent orgasms, and it will never quite satisfy. Sadomasochistic people will repeat the same perverse rituals of domination and degradation again and again, deriving “highs” from it but never really achieving the liberation they seek. Narcissistic people will not be able to come out of themselves enough to really be with another person, so their sexuality will be a repeating pattern of sexual exploitation. Fetishists will act out rituals in which sexual energy is displaced onto an object (such as a shoe or a glove) or a part of a woman’s anatomy (the forearms or breasts or feet), and the act will become alienated and devoid of its primary meaning.
*14/196/1*